Aging Potion
The Potions Master

Welcome and greetings. I have decided to introduce a difficult and amusing potion. It will only fool the eyes (as Fred and George learned), so those of you who would use it for less than honest reasons will find it to be of little satisfaction.

I've noticed a tremendous drop in my class attendance since the beginning of term, which proves my point. Most students lack the talent and brains for Potions. This is a practical subject and if you don't put forth an effort you're wasting my time. For those of you who have remained loyal, I will transform your mind to think as a true genius does. There will be no branch of magic you will be unable to master after I'm done with you.

I have no time for foolishness. Any whining will not be tolerated in this dungeon. I have a new 'Drooling Draught' formula I would love to test, and I'm sure your fellow students would find it amusing. Very few witches and wizards understand this delicate form of magic, but those who do master it learn how to manipulate the human soul and become masters of their world.

-Aging Potion-
Ingredients:

. Scarab Beetles
. Cockroaches
. Fluxweed
. A Giant's Toenail
. Unicorn Tears

This is an advance level potion designed to age any witch or wizard one year for each vial taken. The results are only cosmetic and will only last one week. If you misread the ingredients or have one slip of the hand, the results could be permanent. I once had a student who had to live out his days as an eighty year old man, and legend has it Dumbledore himself once stumbled across a bad batch in his youth. The ability to wave silly pieces of wood and recite ridiculous incantations will not help you. I will dip your wand in 'Ogre Acid' if I see it out again.

Quickly, gather your ingredients together-don't dawdle. Most of your ingredient should be in your standard potion's making kit; however Giants' toenails are very rare. I will provide them for this class. You'll find the list posted above. Be sure you're using a # 2 standard pewter cauldron.

To begin, light a slight flame beneath your cauldron, four inches in height and nine inches in diameter. Start with an empty cauldron; you will not need a base for this creation.

In a separate #2 standard pewter cauldron begin a base solution so you can create a 'Sterilizing Draught'. If you haven't a clue what I'm talking about, clearly you haven't been paying enough attention in class and you therefore need to remove yourself from my presence-you've wasted far too much of the breathable oxygen in this Dungeon. The 'Sterilizing Draught' will serve as your base for this particular potion.

Now that we know your potion is not contaminated with carelessness, we can proceed. Don't you dare try to get past me with a dirty cauldron. If you attempt to make this potion without the proper preparation you'll blow up the entire school.

Take two Scarab Beetles and lay them long ways on your chopping board. Now, using your standard four inch silver scalpel, make a small incision in the belly of the beetle. The bug will release an odorous gas. It has been known to cause violent vomiting in students with weak stomachs. After you have made your incision, place the blade firmly on the right side of the incision and press down. The beetle will release a secretion, which you should scoop up with your scalpel. Add this puss to your cauldron. Repeat this procedure with the second beetle. This will remove the venom from the Diluted Bidimun you used to create your 'Sterilization Draught'.

The next ingredient is a large cockroach (alive). Submerge the cockroach into your potion and stir it four times counter clockwise. If you listen closely you should be able to hear the final screams of the cockroach as it drowns in the bubbles.

The potion should bubble into a light purple color. This is the most difficult part of your draught. You can make no noise during the next two steps. Any sounds will cause the potion to explode and result in injury to the potion maker.

The most volatile ingredient in this potion is the Fluxweed. Use your dragon skin gloves while handling this ingredient. It causes severe burns. Wrap one Giant's toenail in the fluxweed and toss it into your cauldron. An explosion of steam should result. After the explosion, the potion should begin to burp. Do NOT touch your potion for 36 hours precisely.

REMEMBER NOT TO MAKE SOUND. After the 36 hours exactly has expired-- slowly tip toe over to your potion to make sure the ingredients are mixing properly. Slowly stir the potion with the wrong side of a ladle to calm it if it still appears to be burping.

Add two drops of a Unicorn's tears to your Draught as you continue to stir it with the wrong side of the ladle. It should now be ready for consumption but be forewarned. It is impossible to tell if the potion is made correctly, and typically mistakes are only discovered after it is too late. I will be notifying Madeye of this potion we have just created. For those of you who are contemplating dreams of entering your name into the Triwizard Tournament with the use of this potion, wake up.

Side Effects:

. Excessive Facial Hair Growth
. Loss of Vision
. Loss of Teeth
. Liver Spots
. Graying Hair
. Loss of Memory
. Insanity
. Premature Death